Friday, October 22, 2010

Animal love..

I remember when I was a little kid we had a cow , always tied to a rope in her mud built home which was a few feet away from our abode, we called it "Ghari" in bhojpuri, that is my native language. For almost always she remained calm , minding her own business , chewing all the things we threw in her pot , a huge bowl shaped thing, and we loved her so much specially my uncle who milked her every morning and evening and me and my sister got a glass of fresh milk ( right out of factory if you will ). But there were days when she showed a rather disturbed behavior , she kicked around for no reason , sometimes she would even kick the milk bucket leaving nothing that was not floored, not a single drop for cute little kid like me. I wondered ,as a kid, what makes this amazingly kind and sober animal so violent. Guess what ! I realize it now when I talk to my friend's girl friend. Better put in her words ( the girl friend's ) " She did this to spice up the relation, she wanted to make us realize her importance and a little turbulence in relationship ( an argument , if you will , that she was incapable of , thus resorted to mute violence ) , she thought ( probably ) would make her more desirable making us more caring and loving. "
Now you get it. :) :) Welcome to the relationship of animals! Indeed, we are no less.
The whole idea is absurd , that's the way i think , however psychologists and relationship therapists tend to not agree with me when they say that a little fight actually is an improvement on the relationship. There is no denying that make up over and over with the same person is amazingly pleasing, but, my dear friend the misery of arguments is inexplicable and it gets worse when we resort to brutalizing the whole scene by bringing up history. I am no relationship expert so whatever I say has nothing to do with "authentic" guidance or it would be bad to even consider it as a suggestion. But nevertheless it is an alternate way of thinking , a different approach towards building and understanding a relationship.
Being born and brought up in a north indian middle class family which chose to keep it's morals intact and sent me to a school which belonged a rather fundamentalist group upholding the very indian culture which we are proud of ( at least in the text ) , for me love became a selfless pursuit for the nothing but "love" itself. The stories which I read were not written by Ekta Kapoor or Sidney Sheldon, they did not have anything what we all tend to enjoy these days in literature and cinema. The stories I read had depiction of a phenomena where one person was so devoted to someone that she did not care if it was poison that she was drinking, the stories were about people who just fell in love and the faith that they had in the relationship was commendable. My point is , I read about a "love" which had no conditions in it, the feelings were there no matter what, my lover shows up or not does not matter, if I love her , I love her.
Well that is again philosophy , but you young fellow lovers , what is so wrong in pursuing something as perfect as that ? I am sure no one is perfect , but when you talk about something as sacred as "love" , if at all you consider it sacred, I beg you, start giving some respect to the feeling.
Well anyway this concept is less understandable and very difficult to describe in words. What is happening around us is very disheartening. People claiming to be in love and not trusting each other, people getting bored of relationship, people just dumping one and jumping on the other one, eagle eye pursuit for the next prey of "love" , this all is nothing but disgusting. As a believer , that the truest form of love is achievable I feel that my family cow's love for my family was actually a lot better than the relationships that we have around us now. For god sake!! we are humans we ought to do better than her.

2 comments:

Rj said...

Interesting comparisons made. . I will say, that love breeds out of love, and love can only be perfect if both the individuals in the relationship are equally devoted to each other. Since that is a rare possibility, one of them always feels more discontented, leading to small bickerings. But yeah, devotion is not reflected in the number of differences you have, but the number of efforts you make to accept each other and love the same. :-)The cow might kick sometimes, but will never run away. Unfortunately humans do, for sometimes mind meddles more in the matters of the heart.

khushboo..'khush' said...

nicely written and i wanted to read more..